You know, sometimes because you read about somebody doing this sort of thing…
…it is not a cinch it is going to turn out well.
The people who did this sort of thing for religious reasons were years adapted to the area, where they’d lived next to nature all their lives, knew the wildlife, etc….and the primary practitioners I’m aware of also happened to be in warmer climes.
You cannot decide because you have a fantasy ambition to climb down the Grand Canyon, or swim the Columbia River Bar, or pet a moose because you have ‘special understanding of animals….’ that nature will understand and look out for you.
On the other hand becoming one with a grizzly is possible.
Temperatures have been sharply declining in Washington this week, and at altitude, more so: 50 degrees in one’s birthday suit is not a good thing. We have far more wind than usual, ergo wind chill is a factor, and you do not find ripe berry bushes in June…
I hope for the best, because I do, but sometimes I just shake my head in wonder…and feel for the people who have to trek out into the woods after her.
One thing a lot of people don’t seem to realize is that it doesn’t have to be winter for hypothermia to be a problem. All it needs is an air temperature below 98, a little water and a breeze.
That sounds like any day of the year in most of Ontario. I’ll bet you can get sunburned and hypothermia at the same time, some days.
I did a lot of research on hypothermia and frostbite for a story I wrote. Florid has one of the highest rates of hypothermia in the elderly. They go to the beach, swim a little, get cold and then sit in the breeze to dry off.
Attributed to Twain, but known to be not his:
‘San Francisco is the only city where you can lie under a rose bush in full bloom and freeze to death.’
(In the summer, night-time temperatures in the city routinely run 45 to 50F. Even forty or fifty miles away, a wool blanket is a necessity.)
Don’t you just love the big thermal engine off the West Coast of the United States? Even as far south as San Diego, that water is COLD! I swam at Redwood Beach once, I don’t know how the surfers managed to stay in the water, even with their wet suits.
Showers are possible for the next three days.
I recall about 5 years ago, or was it 10, there was a guy with a special understanding of Alaskan brown bears. Then there was a couple of amateur “volcano chasers” 10 years ago that got overrun by a pyroclastic flow. Last month’s tornado chaser in Oklahoma. All candidates for the Darwin Prize.
As I understand it, that tornado chaser was pretty knowledgeable, even contributing a lot; he knew the risks, and his luck ran out with an untimely swerve of the funnel. No Darwin Prize there, IMHO.
But the others get the prize, I think.
No, their luck didn’t “run out”. They knew they shouldn’t have been there. Never deliberately put yourself within range of “an untimely swerve”! You’re askin’ for it!
I disagree, Paul. Tim was not an idiot, he was a lot more safety minded than Reed Timmer, who deliberately drives his vehicle into the storm. Comparing his TVS “Dominator” to Sean Casey’s “TIV”, the Mythbusters used a 747 engine blast to simulate a tornado condition. The “Dominator” lost pieces of its armor, while the TIV suffered a bent anchor strut. Timmer is also the guy who is famous for the “Back up, Joel! Back the f**k up, Joel!” video where he and his crew got caught by a tornado that suddenly veered on them. Tim, on the other hand would not intentionally put himself in the path without doing some pretty good observation of the storm’s behavior before getting close. The problem is, you can’t predict these things, no matter what you do, because the forces that govern their direction are usually higher up in the cloud. Scientists have put themselves at risk in the name of research for hundreds of years. There are some things that just required the human eyeball to observe rather than some instrument. At the time the Trieste descended into the Challenger Deep, there was no sophisticated remote controlled or robotic probe that could have descended that deep. Was it foolhardy for them to have done that? I don’t believe so. Was it foolhardy for Tim and his crew to have set their sensors where they did? I can’t say, but again, if a storm is moving at 70mph over the ground, you really don’t know how fast it’s coming until it’s on you, and as I said before, the characteristics of the storm are dependent upon what’s up in the cloud, not what’s on the ground. I’ve observed storm systems where two separate layers of clouds are moving in entirely opposite directions, with the prevailing winds on the ground moving in a third discrete direction.
It’s real easy to say, “They shouldn’t have been there.”, especially if you weren’t there and don’t know firsthand what happened. If scientists were reluctant to do the research, I’m sure we’d never have ever gotten onto the moon, much less off the ground.
The two “volcano chasers” you mention were world renowned volcanologists who were trying to get closer to a volcano on the verge of eruption. They picked the wrong place to shelter from a pyroclastic flow, (plus some Japanese news photographers). I would vote that scientists chasing their research don’t qualify for Darwin Awards, but rather tragic circumstances. The bear chasers and their ilk however do qualify in my mind…
Yes, I used the word “amateur” because IIRC they didn’t work for any institution, but chased eruptions for the love of it. The only place to be effective shelter from a pyroclastic flow is a coral rock jail cell. They knew better.
One thing about the so-called Darwin Awards. In order to make things funny, and to make the event seem incredibly stupid, is that they are very selective as to the facts they relate. One of their stories concerned an accident at my workplace. I work with and for the attorney how investigated the tragedy and it was a tragedy. There was no stupidity involved–except on the part of the Darwin Award writers. Ever since then, I don’t put much faith in popular reports of tragic and unusual deaths.
It’s certain that ‘Darwin Award’ stories don’t suffer from logic or analytical thought–at least, the first one I ever heard was the one about the guy who (supposedly) strapped a couple of JATO units to his car and achieved (brief) flight across a canyon. Sorry, it just ain’t possible.
Cynically, I have to wonder how much in the way of spirits she had imbibed, sniffed, smoked or injected before she began her quest. She’d have to be naive to the point of lunacy to take off into the forest naked and sober! On the other hand, I heard of a woman bopping out of her car to get her picture taken hugging a bear spotted by the roadside. (I believe some spoil sport stopped her before she got to the bear.)
Nude, I could understand; without any cutting surface other than teeth and nails, not so much. Ingenuity and something that cuts well can make many situations more survivable!
And training. Plop me down in the same situation as, say, Bear Gryll or a Navy SEAL, and there’s no doubt who will be in better shape in a few days. Unless you count me living off my stored fat… 😀
Spiritual enlightenment? Good thing.
Nudity? Okay, if it’s warm enough and you’re with people who don’t mind. (I’m modest about that, but in principle, it’s okay.)
But common sense must also apply.
Brother and sister bear, cougar, wolf, etc., and one’s fellow hairless primates can all be noble creatures.
But one should not abuse their hospitality. No one much likes when someone comes in uninvited, and raids one’s living room, refrigerator-equivalent and pantry, bedroom, or especially the nursery.
Even the most civilized creature will defend their home and hearth and kith and kin.
Uh, no, going out to hug that “cute” bear…. “There’s a strange crazy woman trying to attack (hug) me and force her (“amorous”) attentions upon me. Geez, lady, go find a date!”
Was her name perhaps Goldilocks? ‘Cause y’know, that gal seems to have a history of stalking peaceable bears….
There is, of course, the notion that one should not disturb dragons, because one might be crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
This quite probably applies with other large carnivores also.
If the bear is cute and friendly, that is quite fine. However, perhaps a polite request to go share a refreshment, repast, and an entertainment might be more in order than a glomping attack hug. Just saying.
Let’s temper the speculation with some facts, at least as I recall them. 😉 The location we’re talking about is Skamania County, the Cascades near the Columbia River.
As to bears: there are brown/grizzly bears in the northern Rockies, i.e. Missoula, Montana sort of area. They would be a very considerable threat if they were in her area, but are not. Black bears are still wide-spread, but an entirely different animal, significantly less aggressive. Humans are not prey, so unless she does something really stupid she should be relatively safe, but considering the whole escapade, perhaps all bets are off here.
Wolves: there are some packs in the Blues and Wallowas in north-eastern Oregon. One of the young males from the Imnaha pack, OR-7, went walkabout year before last south-west along the southern Cascades and Siskiyous into north eastern California. As far as is known, meaning almost certainty, there are no wolves in the central Cascades. Washington’s Palouse country bordering their new range in Oregon’s “Alps” would not be very conducive to wolf crossings.
http://www.dfg.ca.gov/wildlife/nongame/wolf/OR7story.html
Cougars now, are a clear and present danger everywhere in the Cascades, and are occasionally seen even around the Portland/Vancouver area. The greatest immediate danger she has there is immobility–she’s clearly a “tenderfoot”! She cannot flee even if the opportunity presented itself.
By far, exposure is her greatest danger.
Should I have included human predators?
There was a man in Alaska very recently who was attacked, killed, and eaten by a black bear. We know this because a trooper shot the bear in question and they found human remains and fragments of his clothing in the bear’s stomach. http://www.alaskadispatch.com/article/20130611/human-remains-dead-black-bear-confirm-alaskans-cause-death
The article states that a noted bear biologist says that black bears sometimes do target humans as prey.
There was also an incident in New York where black bears had gotten way too friendly with the local viewing site, and someone got dragged off and eaten. Bears are too intelligent, learn rapidly, and do not come equipped with middle-class morality. That’s why the rangers have fits about ‘bear jams’, where people in cars have stopped to interact with black bears.
They also range quite far: they occasionally follow the deep creek ravines into the heart of Oklahoma, and we have one we call the Hospital District Bear, who turns up in the very heart of Spokane thanks to some volcanic ridges and brushy cover. That one has scared the whey out of several nurses working the late shift. He likes to investigate the trashcans around the area.
All true, but all I wrote was that in comparison to brown/grizzly bears, black bears are an entirely different animal, significantly less aggressive.
Definitely less aggressive. But curious rascals.
I might add, I never permitted a teddy bear in my room as a child. I have never trusted them.
That, too.
We also have steep cliffs, rock slides, the Western Diamondback rattler, and as you say, this traveler is not likely to discover a way to stay warm. Cougars, yes.
Let us not forget poison plants and mushrooms. Exposure is the biggest worry, though, no question.
Poison oak, I assume. (It’s very pretty in the spring and fall. I’ve seen it, from a respectful distance.)
Would make her uncomfortable, perhaps less so without chaffing clothes, but wouldn’t kill her.
I unknowingly cut through a poison oak stem growing in a filbert with a chainsaw and got chips down my collar to settle at my waistband and points south. 🙁 But it didn’t kill me. 😉
*hands Paul a canister of oatmeal, a bottle of Calamine, and a tube of hydrocortisone*
Benadryl tablets! 😉
A package of TekNu, for immediate use. (It’s a kind of soap that’s intended for removing urushiol, the nasty stuff in poison oak/ivy/etc. You have two or three hours after exposure.)
This can only end in tears.
Nice avatar! 🙂
@Paul: Thanks. I finally how to get it on WordPress from my blog. Yeah, I know it’s not rocket science, but I learn by doing. I do miss my little purple guy somewhat.
IZZAT a Phoenix? A might hard to see…
It’s a tea pot with floral design I did a few years ago. There are better pictures somewhere on my blog. (just click on the avatar).
Jane has me linked on her sidebar.
Oops I forgot I’m on WordPress. It’s http://thesmartcat.blogspot.com/
RI, eh? Only association 😉 I have with RI is Providence residents (founders?) Thomas & Rebecca Cornell, something like my 7th great grandparents, and their son Thomas, 6th GGF, convicted and executed for matricide.
“John Briggs of the town of Portsmouth, aged sixty-four years or thereabouts, ‘being according to law engaged before the council, testifieth: That on the 12th day of this instant month, February, in the night as this deponent lay in his bed, he being in a dream of Mrs. Rebecca Cornell, deceased, and being between sleeping and waking as he thought, he felt something heave up the bed-clothes twice, and thought somebody had been coming to bed to him; whereupon he awaked and turned himself about in his bed, and being turned he perceived a light in the room, like the dawmng of the day, and plainly saw the shape and appearance of a woman standing by his bed-side, whereat he was much frightened and cried out, ‘In the name of God, what art thou?’ The apparition answered, ‘I am thy sister Cornell’, and twice said, ‘See how I am burnt with fire’. And she plainly appeared unto him to be very much burnt about the shoulders, face and head”.
“Whether this affidavit had any weight with the judges is uncertain, but in the light of the evidence that was subsequently received in the witchcraft cases, it would not be improbable that it may have had.”
It’s thought in some part Thomas was convicted by a “vision” of an Uncle, which apparently did not even accuse his nephew.
I read in today’s paper they’ve called off the search.
I heard the other day that they’d been trying to track her on a road, unsuccessfully because roads don’t tend to capture scent. If she were seen on a road, then human predators might be somewhat more likely.
It certainly doesn’t look good. Hypothermia is my guess. First you get too cold, and then you start making bad decisions that can walk you right off an edge.
Hoping for a piece of luck—but the longer lost, the worse.
Luck is about all that is left in cases like these. It’s all so pathetic and unnecessary, sad for all.