Hauling myself out of bed at 6:45, and knowing our street gets real early pickup—I pull on work clothes and head for the kitchen to get the gar-bahjge and recyclables.
No sweat. I stagger about, pre coffee, and haul out the sacks…down the front steps, down the side path, to the side of the house where the cans live.
I pour the recyclables into the bin—oops. Wrong sack. Garbage, eggshells and coffee grounds went into the recyclables bin. The damn recyclables bin is huge. I can’t lift it to pour it into the little regular garbage bin. I tilt it and excavate bare-handed as far as I can reach, pour in the actual recyclables (they insist on no sacks) and put the rest of the garbage in the right can. By now I am all over garbage. I start hauling the monster recyclables bin to the curb…and the sprinkling system cuts on.
I head back after the garbage, and Jane joins the fray, coming onto the porch with a load of cardboard (recyclable) that I missed. I head up to get it, and my contact lens folds, I am all over garbage and can’t deal with it. I take the cardboard and carry it out, and, distracted by the folded contact, I get hit full on in the head by one of the sprinklers as it sweeps.
Dripping wet, I take the little non-cyclable bin to the street, head back up the slope, and by now Jane is out there (neatly avoiding the sprinkler sweeps) loading hollyhock stems into the compostables bin. We go at that. I am now soaking wet, all over coffee grounds, with a folded contact, and well, not my sparkling self. It is, however, approaching funny, and I have slashed my arm on something and am bleeding a stream down my arm, my brand new sandals are wet, and I could be in a better mood if that contact weren’t still squishing around in my eye.
Jane stayed after the compostables, adding more weeds, I headed in to wash off the blood and the coffee grounds, feed the importunate cats, and to fix my contact, which finally wandered back where it belongs—I think—and it’s time to fix breakfast. There’s still the pond filter to wash, but I am changing sandals to the grungy ones and drying out before I attack that.
Welcome to Friday morning at chaos central.